gotgreenmagic | 99

99 - Video

[She's in a room that isn't hers and looks distracted.]

Two things. Rourke is 1) not registering as my inmate anymore, and 2) in a coma right now. If someone could swing by Level 8 with a stretcher and help me get him to the infirmary, well, it'd save me dragging him to the elevator.

[Warden filter, a little later]

So...is this just a thing that happens? Item goes half-dead at random, 'hey this guy's not your problem anymore'?

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I don't normally swing that way, but I'll make an exception this once. [Dean helps himself into the room, glancing around quickly and casually; he sees no sign of struggle, though, and he's heard about the high incidence of narcolepsy around here, so he's not really alarmed. A little fascinated, maybe, when his attention shifts down to Rourke and picking up his share of the load.]

You're the one - I mean, you know my name, but I never got yours. On three?

Shego. Just Shego. One, two -

[She lifts on three, without a gigantic amount of effort, doing her part in getting him to the stretcher. Depressingly this is not the first unconscious body she's had to shift on the Barge.]

[It's not Dean's first experience with dead weight, either, though he's mildly impressed with the smaller woman; he doesn't say it, not more than an eyebrow raise and a twitch of his lips, but then he's distracted arranging the stranger's legs and switching his grip to the stretcher handles.]

Nice to meet you. What's going on?

What can I tell you? It's the Barge. Sometimes you go to a guy's room to tell him he's been arbitrarily de-Warden-ed and you find him lying around comatose instead.

[She figures she could have locked the door and left him in there, but it's probably not all that classy to leave a an unconscious guy in an unguarded room with the Barge being what it is.]

Huh. [Dean considers that while he's hoisting his side of the stretcher, expression thoughtful. Then he quirks an eyebrow and though he's aiming for confident, his joke has an intangible question mark on the end of it.]

Your inmate, huh? Guess this means you're off the hook.

Alternatively it means I just wasted a month I'm never gonna get back, but I can appreciate I'm saving all the months I would've wasted otherwise. [She backs out of the room with her end of the stretcher, heading back to the elevator.]

So. Just like home? [He tries for a joke, because not only is it kind of what he does, but also it keeps him from saying other, dumber things. Imagine that: Dean has thought of dumber things to say than the things he actually says.

He's following her out into the hall, letting her steer them.] Anyway, sorry. That sucks.

Enh. No skin off my back. [She hits the call button and taps her foot, waiting.] If the next one's here for eating babies or something I'll know the Admiral's just messing with me.

[He's probably not supposed to laugh about that, so he tries not to, turning his snort of amusement into a cough as he waits with her.

However.]

So, a regular ol' cannibal would be alright.

[Still in the same deadpan drawl:] Oh yeah, sure. If he gave his entrées a fighting chance I'll know I've got something to work with.

Makes you wonder what the side dishes would be. Jumping beans? [Even he knows he's stretching it, though, and he's glad when the elevator arrives.]

Maybe you'll get a crier.

If I get a crier I'm instituting some kinda time-out system. [She backs into the elevator, hitting the button for the right floor with her elbow.]

[Dean follows, shuffling sideways on so they fit with the stretcher between them, and then stands as patiently as he knows how.]

You'd probably have to set up some kind of gag, too.

...though that might cross the line into kinky.

[It's more an amused noise than a laugh.] Yeah, I'm planning to keep the accusations of sexual harassment to a minimum.

Now that is a goddamn shame. [Dean grins impishly, teasing and flirting harmlessly all in one go. He doesn't wait to get shot down like he did before, though.]

At least you had one for a little bit, anyway.

I'm still not sure that's a good thing but yeah. You haven't been assigned yet, huh?

Nope. [Slight bit of 'tude there - he's kind of annoyed by it, because of what he says next.] Makes me wonder how the hell I'm supposed to get my deal if I don't have an inmate.

It'll happen. And you've been waiting - what, two months? That is nowhere near the worst the Barge has to offer. You could get assigned an Inmate and spend a year working on them just so they can vanish.

[His jovial manner is starting to fade a bit, and he shakes his head. He has never been a patient man.]

Yeah, two months - but even if that happens, at least I'll be doing something.

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99 - Video

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