gotgreenmagic

46

Hypothetical situation. Call it an intellectual exercise.

Inmates versus Wardens. No holds barred - everybody's got all their powers, their mad science, helpful voices in their heads, whatever. Admiral's asleep or out to lunch or just doesn't care, which I'd argue is his default position anyways but my personal biases don't need to be involved here.

Who'd win?

Oh, and if you're going to get your panties in a bunch over me fostering hostility or whatever it is I'm doing, then a) imagine it's just a softball game or something and b) know that you are a total wuss.

[Private to Bruce]

Hey.

[Private to Prefect]

Another lesson tonight?

[Private to Tim]

Hey. I have a question.

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I'm confident that wardens would win, if only because we're the more personable bunch.

Is being personable relevant to a combat situation? I must've missed the memo.

The ability to communicate adequately with your subordinates or peers is imperative in a combat situation. Inmates prove less efficient in that way, I've noticed. That isn't to say that wardens are the paragon of social competence, but I think we're passable.

I think in an all-out 'do or die' situation, both sides would have trouble with too many obnoxious Type As fighting over who gets to give the orders. And Wardens tend to have just a teeny tiny bit more of a problem with entitlement issues. Just saying.

But whatever. So are you actually back back now or what?

Edited 2010-07-19 00:27 (UTC)

The specifics of the situation would have to be detailed to give a real assessment. It's like asking if I'd rather take home Cyndi Lauper or Cindy Crawford. I'd have about ten thousands questions that'd need answering about the logistics of the situation before I could find an honest answer. I'm going to give you that entitlement bit.

It's a rare day on the Barge when we actually have a choice in the matter of present or not present and for how long, and while I'm not making any promises, it looks like I might actually be able to stay the night. I'm not going to plan ahead any further than that.

How've you been?

How've I been? Well, as for current events, my Warden left and got replaced by your non-BFF Banner. Apparently I'm doing the 'cruel irony' run of guys who have problems with the color green.

Other than that? Standard boredom/monotony/understimulation issues. Welcome back to the Barge.

Captain No-Pants finally jumped ship? Nerds of the Barge, despair.

Thank you. I do have Banner's best interests in mind, and I mean it when I say you should give him hell. I don't think he's going to be able to handle it, firecracker that you are. Have you made him snap yet?

No shrines as of the time of writing. Give it a week.

As for the Banner-snapping, not yet, but I've only been assigned for like three days. Why, got any suggestions?

You have to wait until a port because he can't [Tony makes air quotes with his hands] "lose his temper" aboard the Barge. I assume the Admiral put a cap on his gamma radiation while aboard because the thing is huge and the Barge gets enough tears and rips as it is.

This puts me under pressure to please the women of the Barge all by myself.

Roger that. And yeah, he actually told me about the whole celibacy bit. He told me he had an [airquotes!] 'condition' and I may have implied he missed a few too many sex ed classes.

[CONSIDERING PAUSE.]

...not that I could see him pleasing any women of anywhere even if he could. I mean, just....no..

[GLEEEEE.] Heh -- I hadn't considered the celibacy side of it, and suddenly... it all makes sense! Watching him with women is one of the single most painfully awkward experiences I've ever had to endure.

I'm going to give him a month, maybe two on the merit of his stubbornness, but if you break him, don't make him unfixable. I need him for shady organizations back home.

No kidding. I'll try to keep it to hairline fractures and constant low-level irritation but y'know, no promises.

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Private

Private

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Private - THIS HAS BEEN VIDEO THROUGHOUT K

Private - AGREED!

Private