gotgreenmagic

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[Written and filtered to: Profit, Snape, Mozenrath, Kenzie. People on this filter cannot see who else is. Also visible to Tim.]

I did it. Okay? I poisoned Profit.

I did it, and I need to explain how this happened. I don't care how many of you already know. Back at the OS-19 port, Arthas and I were both - affected, assimilated, whatever you call it. I was pretty much his PA. Profit paid her to talk Arthas into leaving the port and making as much distance between them and the Barge as possible in the time they had, and she did.

I'm not going to pull any punches here. I have been here for almost two years and this is the worst thing anybody has ever tried to do to me. Don't start with 'at least you'd still be alive'. No. She would still be alive, with her memories and her experiences. I would have ceased to exist. My identity would have been permanently, irreparably destroyed. If that doesn't fit your definition of murder, I don't want to know what does.

I've had the potion since around January. Mozenrath gave it to me. I don't think he thought I was ever going to use it. I didn't think I was ever going to use it - I didn't ask for him to make it for me, but once I had it I held on to it. And when all this happened, I watched Profit for long enough to know when he wouldn't be home and then I spiked his wine. I don't have any more of the potion and if I did I would have thrown it overboard by now.

So that's it. I'm done. It's for Kenzie to deal with now.

[The following part is added a few minutes later, in voice. She sounds kind of rough and the general background noise indicates 'infirmary' pretty clearly. This part is not filtered to Profit.]

....I'm not done. What I'm going to say next, I want you guys to know: I'm not trying to minimize whatever it is my Warden decides to hand out, I'm just trying to cut down on the lectures about what a terrible person I was for torturing him. [A really, really is-this-thing-still-on long pause:] I know that already. There is nothing anybody can say or do that will make me wish I hadn't done this more than I do already. I went into this not fully realizing what the consequences could've been, I know that's not an excuse, and if I had the opportunity to do this over I wouldn't.

[...]

Mozenrath told me I should just admit to this a few days back, before port. For what it's worth. But he let me take my own time over this. More than I deserved, really.

Now I'm done.

[Still voice, filtered to Profit and Nygma]

You both know it was me. Everybody else it matters to knows as well. If you're going to come after me, just do it, get it over with. I don't care.

[OOC: Open spam in the infirmary is also available to anyone who wants it. ♥ She tried to walk off a dinosaur attack like an idiot and ended up passing out from blood loss once she got back on the Barge, right now she's laid up with scratches to her back and leg.]

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Thank you.

What are you expecting? Retaliation? I'm not like you, Shego, don't belittle me by assuming I am.

[Eddie sounds impeccably calm, but this couldn't be a more hateful, angry, and aggrieved response. Can you blame him? He's been repeatedly made to feel like a horrible person for trying to stop someones suffering.]

I haven't a lick of sympathy for you, my dear. You placed other people in peril whilst claiming revenge for a 'what if'.

Seven was stabbed so severely that a mortal man probably would have died. Mozenrath struggled for your petty whims. My concerns were dismissed as paranoid delusions-- courtesy of the negligent and unprofessional Severus Snape, who made it impossible for me to present my evidence-- and I was forced to watch someone suffer horribly for several hours.

Pull something of this caliber again and I won't be nearly as willing to let bygones be bygones.

Okay.

[That nonchalant dismissal. So much hate for it.

Eddie closes the feed.]

[He is both kind of proud an a lot of asdf still, but that isn't going to keep him from going to see her. Zip, straight to her bed once she's done with that post.]

Hey. What happened?

[She eyes him warily for a moment because she knows he would have had to see everything she posted before working out where she was. But he's here anyway. That's a good thing, right?

Shego's sitting upright on the bed, mostly to keep the pressure off her wounds; the hospital gown on her top half laces up at the back and there's a lot of dressings over it.]

Me and Kenzie got ambushed. I thought it was just scratches, I didn't realize how bad the bleeding was until we got back here.

[This sounds a lot better to her than 'I did something suicidal in defense of a relative stranger out of guilt and then almost bled to death.']

[Tim shakes his head and pulls up a chair. He really has to bite back something that would sound a little too much like scolding. It's not like he hasn't done that before. But still.]

When I'm guessing you passed out? [Hint of disapproval. Tiny bit. But mostly it's really tightly controlled concern. Why the suicidal acts. :c]

[She hesitates only a moment, then nods.] Yeah. [Really the only reason she'd known she wasn't death tolling was that the cuts were still so bad.] Hey. I heard it was your birthday yesterday. [Subtle subject change, Shego.]

[Well that's comforting. :| Tim exhales through his nose, and reaches for her hand. Sometimes physical reassurance was better than anything he could say - sometimes he just had no idea what to say.]

Yeah, It's a good thing Dick remembers this things, I never do.

Yeah. Mine was in April. I didn't remember til, like, late May. [She curls her fingers around his, holding his hand tightly.] Happy birthday.

[He squeezes back, and nods before leaning in to kiss her lightly.] Thanks. So, what can I do? Ice pack? Book? Foot rub?

[Well.] If the foot rub's a serious offer, I'll take it. [She brushes a hand through her hair and rearranges herself a bit, trying to make herself more comfortable although it's basically impossible without putting pressure or strain on something a dinosaur's run its claws through.] Did you go out into port?

[He gets up to drag his chair own to the foot of her bed, and tugs the sheets aside enough to get at her feet, kneading one.] Yeah, after I talked Sylar into it. It wasn't so bad for us. Coincidentally, reptiles don't really taste like chicken.

[Sup, lady-bro, Rex is just making the rounds on his shift.]

So, which one got you?

[She gives him a weary sort of look.] I don't know. Green-ish, big claws, yea high - [She goes to gesture, realizes that lifting her arm is going to pull on her scratches and drops her hand.] - little bit taller than me. Anything else - no idea. The whole thing was over in less than a minute.

[She sighs, rearranging herself on the bed carefully.]

You seem like you made it out okay.

You were lucky to have escaped. Need anything for the pain?

[Rex shrugs, trying for nonchalant, but he's still clearly excited and not doing a great job of holding his glee back.]

I managed to avoid getting their attention, for the most part. But I've got some fascinating footage on my communicator. [He reaches into his pocket and goes for the communicator presumptuously, because why WOULD a dinosaur attack make Shego feel averse to footage of them in action?] Want to see?

I'm good, thanks. [Read: already dosed enough to get over the worst of it.]

[When he goes for his communicator, one eyebrow crawls waaayy up her forehead because do you not understand this is kind of inappropriate, Rex? And yet he looks really -- happy, which is novel, and it feels like it'll take less energy to give in than it will to tell him he's an idiot.]

Yeah. Sure.

[He pulls up the video he recorded of the T-Rex attacking a triceratops and moves over to Shego's side to show her.]

See? Can you believe there are scientists who think that the Tyrannosaurus was a scavenger?

[SCOFF SCOFF.]

I've also managed to get a video of a herd of gallimimus. And some herbivores grazing-- OH! And two male-- I think they were male-- dinosaurs competing for a mate. Or fighting for territory. It's hard to say.

[She watches the T-Rex going at it for a few moments. It's probably testament to how jaded she's become that already it looks more like TV than a real thing that actually happened.]

Huh. Looks like you actually came out of this pretty well. [She rubs the bridge of her nose.] Speaking of animals, could you do me a favor?

Except for a close encounter with a dilophosaurus, yeah. [He pockets his communicator again, arching his brow.] Of course. What?

I have a turtle in my cabin. If I give you the code for the door, could you go after your shift and...check on it, feed it, all that stuff? I would, only... [Only she's still hooked up to an IV, clearly.]

Certainly. [Pause.] What kind of turtle is it?

...It's green? [She pulls a face.] Green and kinda small. The Admiral gives me food and stuff for it so I've never really had to think about it. If you want to identify it while you're in there that would be great.

[Patrick felt pretty fucking terrible about what had happened in port, namely in that she'd risked and almost lost her life in defense of him, and he wasn't really sure how he was supposed to move forward from that. Especially what with the added confession to what had happened earlier.

He headed down to the infirmary after he'd read the post, hesitating for a moment before approaching Shego, shoving his hands into the pockets of his jeans as he stopped next to her bed.]

Hey.

[She looked up at him. She'd been hoping this conversation wouldn't happen just yet - she was feeling a little better after whatever had been done to treat her while she was unconscious, but 'a little better' than terrible was still pretty bad.]

Hey.

How're you feeling? [He didn't really want to get down to business just yet, since really, the more important part was the whole shoving him away from a raptor thing in his mind. There was nothing they could have done to prevent the attack, but he could have done a better job with the emergency medical care on the island.]

[Ugh, small talk.]

I'm fine. Jones or - whoever it was - fixed me right up. Put some stitches in. I don't think I'm going anywhere for a couple days, but... [She huffs out a breath, blowing up a few stray hairs.] I'm fine. You?

[He shrugged.]

I'm okay. Couple scratches and bruises, but nothin' major. [He was quiet for a moment, looking back over at the rest of the infirmary for a few seconds before turning back to her.] Thanks.

It's not a big deal.

[She took a long sip of water and didn't say anything else; if one of them was bringing up the elephant in the room, it was going to have to be him. 'Oh hey also I semi-inadvertently tortured a guy for six hours, your thoughts?' wasn't a way she wanted to start a conversation.]

Edited 2011-07-21 22:08 (UTC)

[Patrick was decent with breaking awkward silences and broaching uncomfortable topics of conversation, so he dragged a chair over and sat down next to her, some of the discomfort he'd been feeling later getting pushed aside.] Why'd you do it? In port, I mean.

[She offered an uncomfortable shrug.] I dunno, it's not like there was enough time to think about it rationally. Getting you out of the way put me in the way, that's all. [It was a pretty shallow lie but it was the best she had to offer just then.]

[That got a sort of concerned eyebrow raise at her.] Wait, you wanted to get in the way of a raptor?

[Shego just looked at him.] How did you get that out of what I just said?

Just making sure. [He was quiet for a moment before asking the next question.] What made you decide to tell us, about what happened?

It was like I said. I spoke to Mozenrath before port, he told me it'd be a good idea, I agreed. [She frowned.] The Barge isn't a great place for secrets. I figured that at least if I came forward I could at least have a little bit of control over who found out and how. I wanted to avoid the whole thing getting ripped apart in public.

Can't say I blame you. This place is fucked up. [Putting it mildly, Patrick. He leaned back in his chair slightly, staring at the wall for a long time, not saying anything. He didn't really know what else to say.]

Yeah.

[Shego lapsed into silence alongside him. She didn't like this. She knew Kirk well enough to know roughly what he was thinking and what he was going to do next, most of the time, but Patrick was kind of alien in those respects. Finally:]

So what now?

[Patrick was sort of in the middle of missing Jason for more or less the same reasons, and after a pause, decided he might as well just be honest.] I don't know.

Kinda sounds like you already learned your lesson.

[She had nothing to say to that for a while - couldn't even find the energy to get her hackles up at being told she'd 'learned her lesson' like a little kid sticking a fork in a toaster. As much as it was true and as much as she didn't strictly want to undergo any disciplinary measures, she was kind of concerned by the idea that she would be seen by everyone else as having gotten away with what she did. Public perception shouldn't have mattered to her but it did.]

It's not happening again. Ever.

[He nodded once.] Alright. I believe you.

[And he did. Her confession had been pretty sincere, and while he wasn't exactly thrilled that she had waited so long to tell him, at least she had eventually, and that was really good enough for him. They were still basically strangers. Or, maybe acquaintances, at this point. Raptor attacks had a weird way of bringing people together.]

You miss Kirk?

[She looked at him bleakly for a moment, but really there was no reason to lie about the obvious.]

Little bit. [She sighed.] Who was your last Inmate before me?

Jason Todd. [Perhaps you've heard of him.]

[Jim's tone is so light and unconcerned that it's almost like he didn't spend hours trapped in a surreal nightmare world.]

These things happen. Don't worry about it.

[There's a very brief pause, then he adds:]

I'm sure I don't need to tell you this, but it was nothing personal. This doesn't change that, as far as I'm concerned. I hope you got some catharsis out of this, but in my experience, revenge is an impractical enterprise. I won't pursue any against you.

...

Thanks.

It's fine.

...

And I'm sorry.

[He's just trying that on for size. Feels weird. He almost means it.]

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