gotgreenmagic | 110

[Bobbi's sitting in an armchair in one of the common room sets with a laptop balanced on her knees. She's holding/wearing two hand puppets of Dick and Tim; she's been getting these from a fan for a while and has puppets of pretty much everyone she interacts with regularly. This sort of thing.]

Good evening, children! Tonight's bedtime story comes courtesy of.... [She glances down to her laptop.] ....AdmiralsAngel69. How very 'late 90s generic screenname' of you. She would like us all to know that 'y'all know dirk is my OTP, open parentheses, dat bitch Shego still needs to die ell oh ell, close parentheses, but this scene was so adorbs I couldn't resist'.

And we're all grateful for that insight. Tonight's choice is called 'A Midnight Encounter' and takes place after the dream arc, which I can guarantee the fandom treated with all the class and dignity it warranted.

[She clears her throat.]

Let's begin.

[And you'd better believe she acts out the parts with the puppets and kinda does the voices.]

'Tim's heart was rushing like a freight train when he woke up, he didn't know if he was awake or still dreaming as he went to answer the door. But when Dick hugged him he knew he had to be awake, because it felt better than it ever could in his dreams.'

D'awww.

'"Don't ever do that again," Dick said angrily, not letting go.

'"Answer the door?" Tim asked. He put his hands on Dick's back, his skin was warm and he could feel his heart beating slowly like a drum. It was disappointing when Dick pulled away.

'"What do you remember?"

'"I was dreaming," Tim whispered softly. He let Dick into his cabin.

'"We've all been dream sharing," Dick stated. "For about a week. No one's sure how or why, but Ariadne suspected it, and I guess Buffy confirmed it. Dean just told me. What do you remember?"

'Tim covered his face with his hands. He was ashamed of his other dreams about Dick. He didn't want to say anything in case he mentioned the wrong kind of dream by mistake.

'"The other me was going to shoot you. So I stopped him."

'Dick looked awful. "You seriously think I'd be fine and just move on with my life like nothing had happened if something ever happened to you?"

And then canon got boring apparently.

'"Of course I don't," Tim mumbled. "You're my brother. I love you." But he hurt inside because Dick would never know how much.

"I love you too, bro."

'"I-I just don't want to go back to sleep by myself, Dick," Tim confessed nervously. There were tears hanging on his blue eyes, like dew drops on roses. "Would you st-stay with me tonight?"

'"I can do one better than that, little bro," Dick replied, smiling lovingly. "I can help you sleep."

"What do you mean?" Tim asked confusedly. He had never done anything with Shego or any of his girlfriends before the Barge.'

Sure he didn't.

'"I mean I can wear you out," Dick asserted, taking Tim by the hand. "In the bedroom."

'Tim's eyes went so wide the whites showed all around. He had dreamed of this for longer than he could remember but he had never dared to hope it could come true.

'"Do you mean it?" he gasped.

'"Sure I do," Dick laughed. "We love each other, right?"

'Tim felt hot all over and so happy he wanted to explode. He leaned in to kiss Dick and...'

.....aaand then it all starts moving towards a situation I'm not narrating for the minors in the audience. But if I was to wrap this up in one mime:

[She lifts her hands to make a gesture with the hand puppets that is, well....put your palm on the back of your other hand and vigourously rub it up and down. Now imagine your hands are representing two men. That's what's happening here. She also adds in a squeaky puppet-y voice:]

Sorry Tim, I'd give you a reacharound but my arms are too short, also I don't have any fingers

[Ahem.]

Oh-kay guys, anyone doing Bobbi's Bingo can tick off: 'Awfully Adverbs', 'Just Say 'Said'', 'Retconned Virginity', 'Teenagers Are Eight Year Old Girls' and....take it from me, 'Anatomy Doesn't Work That Way' and 'I Got 'The Talk' From Internet Porn' are both gimmes. If that's a bingo for anybody, swing by my trailer for your prize. Later!

[She makes both puppets wave goodbye and then leans over to turn off her communicator.]

[OOC: Replies to come from

underemployed]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

There's something wrong with you. Really.

There is everything right with her. I would rather spend all two weeks doing this than participating in five seconds of your fancy talent show.

You do realize it's extra gross since Logan and I are siblings in real life, right?

Yes, and if it happened in real life it would be disturbing as hell.

When puppets do it, however? It's funny.

The puppets kind of just seal the deal on it being creepy.

(no subject)

buywithme - 2012-05-14 23:34 (UTC) - Expand

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buywithme - 2012-05-15 00:37 (UTC) - Expand

Lemme guess, you're coming to this conclusion having watched the entire thing?

I took a break in the middle to vomit into a trashcan for like, ten minutes, if that's what you mean.

And what, you thought the second half would be better?

No, but I wanted to make sure I knew just how much I needed to yell at you.

underemployed - 2012-05-14 23:14 (UTC) - Expand

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underemployed - 2012-05-15 00:35 (UTC) - Expand

I have to go clean the gay out of my ears now.

[Sad Dick puppet is sad. Look how dejected you've made him. He only wants to love you.]

Don't worry about it, breakthroughs in modern science suggest that the gay is not actually transmissible.

Do you have puppets of everyone? Because that crosses from ironic into creepy.

Only the characters Shego hangs out with. Hold up.

[She obviously has a box of puppets somewhere off-camera. Rummage rummage rummage TA-DA! Arthas puppet. Blue felt, white yarn hair, eternal >:C face.

Look! He's waving at you. Angrily.]

That puppet needs a bigger package.

underemployed - 2012-05-15 00:16 (UTC) - Expand

darknessb4me - 2012-05-15 00:20 (UTC) - Expand

Sometimes I think people in this place actually like being bored. That was excellent.

[Elaborate bow with much hand-twirling.]

I was thinking Prefect/Marquis next week but I don't have a Marquis puppet. [Sad forever.] Maybe if I got Shego more scenes with him I'll get sent one.

Just get one of the other puppets to fill in for him. Like... I don't know...

...

Do you have any other old puppets?

I guess Cissie's counts as old now but I'm keeping that in storage. Otherwise, not really, her social circle's been pretty consistent? I think I have a Harper one but he's not exactly Marquis-able.