gotgreenmagic

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10

[Inmate filter minus Snape]

The British wizard guy. Severus. It's like half the people on this dump know who he is. I'm in the other half. What's the deal?

[Private to Parker]

Hey. Drink?

[Private to McCoy]

So, is the random self-destructive behaviour on Jimmy's part like a long-term thing, or has it started since he got here? Because I don't really want to beat on him again if he's going to enjoy it. Talk about counterproductive.

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Shego wasn't a hundred per cent sure about Drinking 101 - although 'green' was an improvement on 'little', at least that was objective - but she did as she was told.

"You know the doc?"

"Yeah, I know him. He's one of the few people on this fucking heap worth anything. We tend to drink together." She smiled again before she took a sip of her scotch. It tasted somehow odd to her, and there was no burn. It was weird, and made her brain flick for a moment before she took another sip of the scotch.

"All right, green girl, your turn."

"I'm twenty-five. When do I get an upgrade to 'green woman'?" Whatever. She took a small sip of her drink and her mouth pinched a bit. The bourbon and the champagne had been sweeter, she wasn't expecting this quite so much. Still...

"Not bad."

"When I decide so. You're twenty-five and all you've drunk is champagne and bourbon and those are on the barge? I had drunk more then that by the time I was fourteen." She watched Shego's face while the girl took a drink of the scotch and water. Quickly Parker reached over and grabbed the glass, draining it.

"We'll start with something more girly and work up to this." Vodka was poured into a glass, and then she filled it the rest of the way with juice. A swish and it was handed back. "Vodka and cranberry juice. If we had a lime it would be a Cape Cod."

"So, what, you measure maturity by levels of alcohol abuse? Not drinking was a lifestyle choice for me, not a....I don't even know what you think it was." She accepted the glass and took a sip. Better. And it wasn't even like she cared about the crack regarding 'girly drinks' since she was a girl.

"No. I measure maturity by maturity, Green." She finished her scotch and then made a stronger version of the Cape Cod for herself. "Alcohol abuse is just a bonus." The vodka tasted proper, but the scotch... what the hell? Don't think, don't think, don't think she reminded herself.

"So," she said quickly. "What are you in for?"

"Theft, sabotage, delivering beatdowns...helping my boss try to take over the world. Key word 'try' because he was, like, a pathological loser." She shrugged, casual as ever about her past crimes. "You?"

"Kidnapping, murder, working for a company that controlled a fair amount of the world. Doing my job well, essentially." She was being flippant, because of course the past crimes weren't that important now. Settling back into her chair, Parker took another drink. "How much champagne did you drink?"

"The bottle. Pretty much in one go." And she still wasn't sure if Amber had told her she was a lightweight or not. "Seemed like a good idea at the time. I know it was dumb."

"Bubbles will kill you if you chug. Every time." Parker smirked when Green said that it seemed like a good idea at the time. "Everything seems like a good idea at the time. Everything fun anyway." A chuckle and a sip. "It was dumb, but that's what you do when you're drunk. Well, really honest and true drunkenness. Get stupid, make out with people you normally wouldn't, and then feel like shit the next day. But then you learn to drink a fuckton of water and take two advil before you go to sleep and you wake up fine."

Shego gave an appreciative smirk and sipped her drink.

"Best advice I've had since I showed up in this dump. Which should make it pretty clear exactly how great a warden Jimmy's not." She paused. "Thanks."

"You're welcome." She laughed out right at the fact that the best advice had come from her and not from a Warden. "I find it fucking hysterical that Captain Kirk is your warden. That he's a warden here at all. Like what the fuck, Green girl, how does this happen?" A rhetorical question and she took another sip of her drink. "Granted," she said after a moment, "I'm glad McCoy's here, but he's more warden like then Kirk the manwhore."

"Everyone's more wardenlike than Kirk. Ugh, I'm more freaking wardenlike than Kirk. McCoy asked me to go stop him doing something dumb when his older twin showed - if an outside observer had to play 'guess the Inmate' there I'm pretty sure they'd lose."

Then she shot Parker a sideways look. "You're 'glad he's here'?"

"I think you're right. It's rather... fucking pathetic the way some of the wardens are here." Parker finished her drink and then looked expectantly to Shego as she reached for the bottle of vodka. "I'm pretty fucking sure I'd lose and I've been here for long enough that I should." Minus two weeks.

"Didn't I say he was one of the few fucking people on this thing I could stand?" Parker's brows rose towards her hairline, and she poured a rather large amount of vodka into her glass.

"Yeah, you said that," Shego said mildly, holding out her glass in response to the look. But frankly, 'glad' seemed like a hell of an endorsement from someone who seemed to hate everything and everyone quite as much as Parker did.

"Yes I did," Parker reiterated before she added the vodka to the glass, this time adding a bit more then she had prior. Juice topped it, and there was just enough in Parker's glass to change the color into a light red.

The people whom Parker liked were few and far (very far) between. She was trying to be better about that here, but at this point... there was probably one person who made her feel like she wasn't a complete nut case. "I'm smoking," she announced after a moment, in a tone that suggested she didn't give a damn if Shego was against it or not. It was something, however that she hadn't spent the entire thing smoking.

"Your room, your lungs, your choice," Shego said, shrugging. "So, how long've you been stuck here?"

Parker pulled out a cigarette, (one of the few that she had remaining) and lit it quickly. Eyes closed for a moment as the first puff moved into her lungs. Ah, heaven. Her stash had been someone depleted lately, and it annoyed her that she was now going to have to search for a new way of getting cigarettes given as her warden was being a fucking bitch. "Two months, I think, maybe a little longer." She took another puff on her smoke before she sipped her drink. "Time doesn't feel exactly steady on this fucking thing. Not too long before you got here."

"Almost six weeks ago," Shego said with death in her voice. "You know what my jail record was before this? Ten freaking days." She lifted one hand and let it flare with green energy, black spots dancing around her fingers. "I've been pretty hard to hold up until now, y'know? Screw this place."

For someone who had never actually been held in jail (though the Centre was arguable), she understood about how feeling cooped up was. Her brow lifted, however when she saw the hand flare with green energy. "I agree," Parker said quickly. "Fuck this place in the ass with no lube." She took another sip of her drink. "I love that this shit is supposed to rehab us with everything going on." Everything going on was of course very close to her two lost weeks, so she didn't dwell on it. "I don't think anyone actually fucking does leave, ever. Not really."

"I spoke to one guy who graduated," Shego said, then rolled her eyes. "Graduated, then came back as a warden, because clearly this dump deserves a return visit."

She finished off her second glass. "Pretty sure this is some whacked social experiment or something. The Admiral seems more</> than crazy enough for that."

Parker raised her brows as she crossed her arms in front of her. "Why the fuck would anyone want to do that?" It totally blew her mind that someone would want to come back here. "I'm amazed that the Admiral doesn't need to drug people to get them on this heap."

At the finishing of the second glass, Parker added vodka to it, and then added the juice. She had considered the social experiment thing. "No," she said with authority. "He doesn't have enough control on it to be a social experiment. Too many variables for it to be viable." Parker knew that because she had seen it. She had seen what the Centre had to do in order to assure that Jarod... line of thought smashed before she added vodka to her own glass and downed it with a little wince. "No, he's just a fucking sadist pretending to be a humanist and wanting to help people. I fucking hate people like that."

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